Shortbus was, and will remain, one of the only movies that
made me feel completely and utterly uncomfortable. I consider myself a very
open minded person. I have been accused of being gay in the pass. I have had
gay friends, I have served with gay members of the military, and I have gay
family members. The fact that I really and truly felt uncomfortable and truly disgusted
makes me feel very angry at myself. I always used to tell my gay friends “look I
don’t care what you do that brings you happiness” but from this film I realized
that I’m only okay with it if I don’t see it.
There were a lot of other conflicts taking place in this
film, but the gay issue was the only one that struck me. The emotion was so raw
and obviously the sex was real. It took the idea of gay people, and gay sex out
of your mind and it put it in front of you and forced you to deal with it. It
made you deal with the questions are you homophobic, if so then why? Something I
can’t answer right now. Me personally, I would have to conclude that I am, but I
don’t like it. I don’t like gay sex, and I feel I should apologize for it.
However I realized that what gay people do in the bedroom doesn’t make those
people a bad people and I stand behind that. I feel for the fact that some
would rather choose death than to live gay. I feel for the fact that some don’t
feel like Americans, and aren’t perceived as Americans. The film inflames a
struggle in me to come to turns with my homophobia and to help other people see
that it’s is an issue. In order to do that I myself have to believe that it
really isn’t an issue. Love is love and happiness is happiness, no matter who
shares it. That is the beginning of coming to turns with gay relationships.
Everyone deserves to be happy.
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